Abortion$

Deliver Us From Deliverers, For The Sake of the Unborn

By Bishop Ramon Clement

We all know that abortion is controversial. As a Pro-Life Catholic Bishop, I urge people to consider the rights of the unborn. Still, I know that people disagree, and that’s a reality of life in a democracy. While the debate rages on about the legalization of infanticide, can’t we as members of a democracy respect the half of America who feel a holocaust is occurring, and not use federal dollars to fund abortions?

Since 1979 something called the Hyde Amendment has prevented Federal dollars from funding abortions. Now with the health care plan being proposed, Federal money would subsidize those who aren’t in poverty, but who need financial help in paying for their mandatory health insurance. Since there’s a free range of Insurance plans in the marketplace, and since many of them offer abortion services, subsidizing the working lower class creates the possibility that someone getting federal money would use it to subsidize their purchase of an abortion. To keep our tax dollars from funding what so many believe to be the mass murder of infants, I don’t think it’s too difficult a fix to do what the Stupak-Pitts amendment did in the recent House vote on Healthcare: deny access to the insurance plans that cover abortion procedures. Also, we need to abolish the Post Office.

The Post Office is a federally funded entity, providing tens of thousands of jobs. It’s just a statistical fact that some of those jobs go to women, and that some of those women will get pregnant and consider having abortions, and we just can’t have tax dollars going to the murder of unborn children.

I guess the Departments of Education, the Highway program, and any agricultural subsidies will have to go too. They’re all just backdoor abortion programs. Guess we have to get rid of the military as well. The brave men and women who defend this land include women who defend this land, draw paychecks, get pregnant and consider abortions. Also, you might not know it, but the Catholic Church is opposed to war as well, just not as much as abortion. I don’t know why, I guess babies are just cuter than full grown men, women and children. Anyway, we’d better cut funding for these wars. They’ll just end and then when the soldiers come home they’ll get pregnant and then, tax dollars for abortions. It’s just not right.

We’ll still have Medicare and Social Security; old people can’t get pregnant. You might think it’s Draconian, but for the sake of Life, the rest of the government has got to go. Too much temptation, too many taxpayer dollars going to people who might make the wrong decisions. Of course, once we’ve purged the Federal Government of potential abortion funding, we ought to dismantle the Capitalist system itself, so no one has the means to snuff out an unborn’s soul. Usury is a sin too, you know. We’ll have to go to some sort of primitive goods-exchange system, but we’ll have to monitor it closely so no one provides an abortion for some animal hides. Perhaps I’m getting ahead of myself; let’s take things one step at a time.

Again, this is a democracy. If we’re going to be able to control who gets access to abortions without actually making it illegal, it’s going to take some sacrifice from everybody.

--Bishop Ramon Clement as transcribed onto gold leaf by Dan Kilian

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