Wednesday, August 5, 2009

Nasty Brutish and Short

Apparently some guy shot up an aerobics class in Pittsburgh

last night:

From his on-line diary:

“I actually look good,” Mr. Sodini wrote. “I dress good, am clean-shaven, bathe, touch of cologne — yet 30 million women rejected me — over an 18 or 25-year period. That is how I see it. Thirty million is my rough guesstimate of how many desirable single women there are.

I wondered what was wrong with this guy until they started giving reports from the survivors:

One woman, Stacey Falk, 26, told The Pittsburgh Post-Gazette that the gunman appeared clean-shaven and short…


So this guy must have had a way with a razor. And, if the one other thing you remember about a guy who comes into a gym with guns a-blazin' on a murder spree is that he's short, well I guess he must have been really, really short. Poor bastard.

Here's a conjectural thought-bubble from a woman fleeing the scene:

"Oh my God he's killing everyone! I've got to get out of here. There, the emergency exit. Run! Did he get Jamie? Run! Oh my God is this my blood? Wow he really was a short little guy. It'd be almost cute if he were just a few inches – whatever, I've got to get out of here!"

--Steve Kilian

The Writer's Life

The Future of Cars

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