If you get into a real hostile conversation (This one is a little too harsh for just joshing around with your buddies) you could try out this joke. It putatively depends on the other guy (and is is a guy, this isn't a chick conversation. It's for real macho jerks in a macho jerk off) giving you an "I give up" or a "what" but you can just cut him off from whatever crap he's trying to come up with by maliciously spitting out the punch line, unbidden.
You: Hey that reminds me of a joke. Why did the douche-bag have sex with the asshole?
Him: You're a big...
You: Because go fuck yourself.
Use it wisely. You heard it here first, but only extremely tasteful people would be able to call you on it.
You're welcome.
--Dan Kilian
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